Turn of Events

Life is just a sum of different events. Big or small. We usually forgot the small ones and the big ones are forever etched in our brain and heart.

Small events like the thousands of times we brushed our teeth or the hundred of kilos of gorgonzola I consumed weren't remember. But no matter how many times you say goodbye or lost someone, no one will forgot how daunting the experience felt. You might be immuned to it but its never forgotten, you put it in a vault, locked it up, throw away the key and hope that you would never deal with it again. But I am sure these horrible feelings and memories will have a way of sipping into your mind eventually. 

Today I had to say goodbye to a friend again. She was quite upset. I hate goodbyes, its never pleasant. Its a part of life. I had said more goodbyes in the past year than I did previously. Goodbyes are painful - Putting up a defence system by not getting attached is the easiest way to cope. I've gotten used to it (though just recently). 

This is where turns of events came in. Life is a fascinating matter, when I thought it would go in this direction, suddenly it took a U turn and I landed elsewhere. I never thought of seeing my friend so soon again. But 4 months later, we somehow managed to make it happen. When life gave me a U turn, I embraced it, seized the opportunity and went for it. I got lost, very very lost. J.R.R Tolkien onced said in his books "Not all that wanders are lost". But I'd say "Those that are not lost, most probably did not wander".

Perhaps its just me and getting lost is a bitch. That feeling is indescribable. Its the hardest part of being a grown up. Its extra challenging when there is a rather strict social convention that frown upon those that wanders. But those that wanders had the best stories, those that has the courage to wander would be able to do just about anything. I would suggest everyone to get lost and not stress about it. Things will fall into place.

It is scary, I am not going to lie. Most of the time uncomfortable and not easy. It requires a lot of patience and peseverance, not to forget a very very thick skin. People will doubt you on the way but if you hang in there enough, things will come. Truth be told, I have absolutely no idea where I will end up, what I am going to be in all perspective. Its shit scary and sometimes I can't help but wonder will those "things" ever arrive? What are those "things"? Will I really be happier when it finally does? 

Before we part ways after a short few days, we gave each other a very simple yet meaningful gift. Here is my picture of her holding that gift.