Written while Drunk on Thoughts

26 Aug 2014

Best Supporting Role in Life

We are liken the opposite polarity in a magnet. Yet, you will always find us in one. She is North and I am South. She is tall and I am "petite". She lives north to where I do. Introducing my other half of the magnet and this is our story.

Just like any pair of humans, we have a story to tell. We met in a cold, rainy but wonderful city called London. Both strangers to the city trying to make sense of how people live in such gloomy and wet city and still absolutely love it. It was an October evening, 2012. It was then our love story started and the rest was history.

Actually, NO. We remained acquaintances for a better part of the time we were roommates, both busy with our lives and didn't cross paths until late May the following year. I'll be honest, it started with a boy, lots of food and then followed by another boy and another (2 out of 3 is mine :p). She went through it with me, no matter where we both were. Now, none of those mentioned boys play a major role in our lives and here we are, closer than ever.

Our relationship had evolved to a level that in almost every experience I shared, it involves "my best friend in Thailand". Yes, I am that annoying and she is that influencing. We are so different but we found a connection between us. We did not share a lot of beliefs and principles but we did not judge the other for making choices that the other wouldn't. It wasn't the easiest having to compromise but its all part of the "perfect" relationship. A "perfect" relationship that is full of flaws and requires a lot of effort. A relationship that we both are willing to work towards.

We did not live in the same city but yet we managed to see each other every 3 or 4 months and this time round, I flew myself to Bangkok to see her. When we do, it was as if no time had passed. This is my perfect long distance relationship. *If only I could actually put my effort into other relationships.*

True friend isn't being inseparable, true friend is being separated and nothing changes.

From London to Cologne, from Berlin to Bangkok. NOTHING changes. 

I miss you...

22 Aug 2014

What if?

Credit: http://connie-stillbelieve.blogspot.com/2013/08/georgetown-penang-street-art-mural.html
Heartbreaks are inevitable. It happens everywhere, anywhere, anytime and for various of reasons. Your heart breaks when someone broke it, when you don't get what you really wanted and worked hard for. Your heart breaks when a loved one left you, willingly or not. We are all humans and one serious blessing that humans have is emotion.
My heart breaks when I knew I am separating with a good friend, even though what really separates us are just earth distance and potentially, life.
My heart breaks the most when I know no one is at fault.
My heart breaks when an important and constant element of my life, even for a tiny while, was taken away from me.
My heart breaks when I lose something that wasn't mine at the first place. 
I believe lots of people are no stranger to what I was and am going through. The apparent and cruel uncertain situation that we are in definitely added some much needed mystery in life. There are a much bigger picture to consider and most of the time, humans are haunt by the deadly questions of "What ifs?" The wonderful scenario that only exist in your dream and That ideal life that only come to life when you are not conscious.

Yes, I am an advocate of "you attract what you wanted the most", I had proven myself wrong a dozen of times. But sometimes these said emotion get the better of me and I lost the strength that I had been accumulating to face these uncertainties in seconds.

But I also remember the thousand of times that I was reminded that the Spaghetti Monster has a funny way of sorting things out. The friend you never thought you would see again? You saw him twice in a span of 5 months or He suddenly told you he will be moving to a city near you. The person that was never in your circle of friends and thought you will never come across? Bam! You met her and she became one of your closest friend. The person you thought is going to be family? Nope, just a passerby in your very own story.

I do have my own set of thoughts and opinions. It was drastically different than what it was just a year ago and I am sure it will be different next month. All I can do is try my best to be a better me and hope for the best. The sole reason as to why 2 people would be in the same city in precisely the same time for years but never crossed path did when they happened to be in another city is a simple one: The time is not right. Then when you finally did met and had a great connection just to find out the interaction is a short-lived one? Again, the time might not be right or both of you are just not right for each other and the Spaghetti Monster is trying to spare you a larger pain than the one you are experiencing now.

Its a cliché but EVERYTHING DO HAPPEN FOR A REASON. Most of the time, hindsight and retrospective that have the perfect vision. The reason as to why bad things has to happen to you are actually probably blessing in disguise. And when you finally have something, you learned to appreciate it.

I'd like to think of pain as a mentor, teaching us all the life lessons that we are ought to learn. Because what is a better teacher than heart-wrenching and soul crushing pain? Remember that pain is TEMPORARY but what you learned is PERMANENT. After the lesson, pick up the pieces, stitch it up and continue learning.

17 Aug 2014


Something I was blessed with. I trust easily. Stranger Danger are usually a foreign concept to me. 

But face it, this is exactly how putting trust on someone will look like. Vulnerable

Bestie told me I trust too easy. I'd like to think I have a superpower that enables me to know who to trust.

Unfortunately, I did not. I placed my trust on someone that I shouldn't and since then I lost my ability to trust. I still trust my family and friends but I no longer trust someone enough to make them my Partner in Crime. 

I am now aching to be able to trust again because I have met my Spongebob. 

15 Aug 2014

To Burn or not to Burn

I am a Malaysian. We don't burn. We have sun shining on our backs just about everyday in a year. Sure, there are cloudy and rainy days but just about 90% of the time, we have the sun. That makes majority of us dislike the sun. But I love it.

I love the warmth, I love how happy people are when the sun is out. I am a sun convert, any opportunity that calls out to me, I will be there, armed with my trusty H&M bikini and my sunglasses. YES, you heard it right, I don't do sunscreen.

Before throwing the nagging and advices regarding how bad sun is for the skin, I know it, I know it all. But because I am in favour of the tan look, I tried to skip sunscreen as much as I can. Irrational and illogical thinking because sunscreen doesn't actually prevent you from being tan.

So, I went on an adventure that basically consist of eating, drinking and lying under the sun for hours on end WITHOUT sunscreen. Day 1 doesn't do much harm on me, then comes Day 2. I fell asleep on the beach after being up the entire night. It took me 5 hours sleep under the sun around noon. I left the beach completely burnt and in slight pain.

I am almost 90% done here. 

The worse has yet to come. I went back to the hotel for a shower. The shower stings. It stings so bad that putting on clothes seems like a torture and I look like a lobster. I learnt my lesson there and then. I just officially wrecked my largest organ. I had to make do with the only lotion I have with me and endure the pain all the way back home before I could steal some Aloe Vera from the garden to slather on my well-done body.  

I want to avoid using store bought Aloe Vera for the first few time, so I googled and came up with a few home remedies to treat sunburn. Most of the ingredients are readily available in the kitchen, except probably an Aloe plant.

Treatment 1:
1. Few stalks of the fattest Aloe leaves
2. Honey

What to do?
1. Carefully wash the Aloe leaves and sliced them into half
2. Scoop or scrap the gooey center into a bowl
3. Add Honey
4. Slather it all over burnt area

Tips: Store the Aloe in the fridge, the cooling touch will feel great on your burnt skin.

Aloe is meant to calm the sensitive area down and honey acts as a soothing anti-inflammatory.

Treatment 2:
1. Milk
2. Oats

What to do?
1. Run a room temperature water (about 20c)
2. Pour milk into water (I don't have an exact measurement, as long as the water isn't clear)
3. Add in some oats (Also just eyeballing the amount)

Tips: You might want to put the oats in a muslin cloth and tie it up to avoid messy cleanup after.

Milk contribute to the soothing element and oats are great for providing some moisture into sensitive skin.

I soaked myself in the bath for about 30 minutes and slathered myself with the Aloe mixture every now and then. My proper "spa" treatment in years. My skin stings much less after the bath but I made sure I slather on Aloe every hour or so. Not only the Aloe help lessen the warm pulsating sensation the skin felt, it did wonder on the skin, the pain went away after a day. Lesson learned? I will always always always have sunblock on AND I am staying away from the beach for a while now.


Bonus: I now have a great golden tan and a pre-6 packs.

9 Aug 2014

Pending Love

Another person, another city, another Goodbye. It doesn't get any easier, in the midst of all the crying and questions, it dawned to me - I didn't want permanence, not yet. I am not willing to commit when all I could think of is to keep exploring the world. Though sometimes, life throw some obstacles and made me think twice every now and then, my mind never sway far from the adventures I could have had. Thanks for making a rather mundane duration of my life worth getting excited for. Thanks for helping me realised what I deserve. Thanks for being an important person in my adventures, 外星人. To the exchange of many future cheesy articles.

Pending Love

The day we met
Fresh out of the love battle
Refused to get back in the very same battle

We are both from different planets.
Both stars,
travelling in search of our perfect match.

I found you at an unexpected collusion.
A collusion that burns.
A collusion which flame never goes out.

We did not shatter from the collusion.
We fused together
And made a unique star
so beautiful that millions admire.

The journey to earth isn't an easy one.
Together we fight our way through,
enduring the burning, piercing pain.

The burn worn us out.
The burn exhaust us.
But we kept trying,
fighting to stay together.

There's an old cliché: Everything good has to come to an end.
But we are not clichés.
We are the love that is pending.
Piercing through all elements of time and space.

- Melissa