Written while Drunk on Thoughts

18 May 2014

Fellow Wanderer


Place I call home.
I found love, lost it and eventually found it again.
Funny how people you know for a year managed to make you feel more loved than someone that was in your life longer. 

We are verbal, we are physical.
Its true that love shouldn't come from the mouth.
It should come from actions. 
It comes from sitting next to you in your temporary home.
It comes from sitting opposite you on the happiness train.

The tears, the pain and the loneliness.
No we are not glamorous.
Nor are we any luckier. 

We are all humans.
Who left the comfort of home and wander.
It takes courage and patience. 

We fell, we cried, we whined.
But we always managed to learn,
the heart-wrenching way.

Its as if we are addicted.
Addicted to life lessons.


I would like to dedicate this poem to my fellow wanderer, the Splendid Wanderer. 

6 May 2014

Does age matter?

All my "relationships", I had always always been the younger one. Loosely translate to being the more immature one. It ranges from months to years. I used to think I am mature enough to handle the relationship only to realise I am not as mature as I would like to be.

Just about 2 months ago I met a younger person. He is not normally in my age horizon, more of my sister's. I must admit and apologise for being a person that is quick to judge. I see a person as young as my sister, immediately I came to conclusion that he is too young and a kid. I rarely associate myself with someone my own age, let alone someone younger. My bad.

An absolute sweetheart and had been with me through my breakdowns, confusion, good days and extremely bad moments. I am incredibly grateful that someone are willing to listen and is pleasantly surprise that it is him. Who knows someone that bears the Italian version name of the very same one that broke my heart is helping me heal what is remaining. Humans put on a mask that only show a tiny portion of their true self as self-defense. With him, I didn't. Perhaps he is just really good in convincing me that he is not a jerk.

With him being mature beyond his age, my previous perception about younger people changed forever. But that doesn't generalise all younger (than me) people. Same goes to people that are older. Maturity doesn't comes with age. It comes with experience.

I wanted to dedicate this post to you, my dear sweet friend. You are dearly missed. We will meet again in the near future.


3 May 2014

What is LOVE - Part II

7 months ago I wrote about what I considered LOVE. That was a long time ago because things changed. When I said things, I meant THINGS. I fell out of love, I fell in love, repeated the process again, met new people that showed me love is more than just "love".

What I considered love is still valid for me and my definition of it expands to a whole new level. Why restrict yourself to one definition?

Love is:

  • When She still cries when she says goodbye, even though that was the umpteenth time.
  • When a kid made sure you got on the seesaw with him minutes before you leave and took away your shoes so that you can't leave.
  • When a kid decided to like you. Kids are the most authentic human being, no diplomacy, no politeness. They either like you or not.
  • When someone calls you bodoh (Malay for stupid) for certain actions but secretly like you for that. 
  • When someone made sure you stay true to your feelings even though he knows it will make you uncomfortable and upset. Then will stay there with you for the entire duration of your break down.
  • When someone told you that both of you will proceed of being in each other's lives for the rest of it. Contract void when one dies.
  • When they are always there no matter how far or how long you had wandered off.
  • When someone decided to take you as you are. All your quirks and all your exploitable kindness.

What is love to you? Is it conditional or unconditional? Does love makes you a scarier or more lovable person?